


The Scent of Magic

by tablelamp



Category: Golden Girls
Genre: Companionable Snark, Gen, Love Potion/Spell, Perfume, Snark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-11
Updated: 2019-10-11
Packaged: 2020-12-09 08:16:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 553
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20991725
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tablelamp/pseuds/tablelamp
Summary: Dorothy was reading the morning paper when Blanche came bustling into the kitchen.  "Dorothy, have you been using my perfume again?""For me to use it again, Blanche, I would have to have used it a first time," Dorothy said, not looking up from the paper.





	The Scent of Magic

**Author's Note:**

  * For [chase_acow](https://archiveofourown.org/users/chase_acow/gifts).

Dorothy was reading the morning paper when Blanche came bustling into the kitchen. "Dorothy, have you been using my perfume again?"

"For me to use it again, Blanche, I would have to have used it a first time," Dorothy said, not looking up from the paper.

"Well, it's not where I left it, and I wanted to wear it today," Blanche said.

"I'll tell the perfume police. I'm sure they'll get right on that," Dorothy said, still not looking up.

Blanche swatted the newspaper with one hand. "This is no laughing matter! This particular perfume is very important. It has...unique qualities."

The ridiculousness of that statement finally got Dorothy to look at Blanche. "Unique qualities. A bottle of perfume."

Blanche nodded, sliding into the chair beside Dorothy's at the kitchen table. "I bought it when I was down home, from a mysterious woman who lived on the outskirts of town." Blanche lowered her voice to a whisper. "They say she was a witch."

Dorothy looked at Blanche, silently trying to figure out if she was serious. She seemed to be. "Do they."

"The things she sold, they were special. Everybody knew that," Blanche said. "I happened to have a hot date coming up--"

"You? No," Dorothy deadpanned.

Blanche ignored Dorothy. "--so I went to see her, to ask her if she had anything that could help me out a little bit."

"Are you saying this perfume is a love potion?" Dorothy asked, finding the idea hard to believe.

"No, of course not," Blanche said, smoothing her blouse. "Love potions are supposed to make people care for you who don't already, and I would never want to manipulate someone that way."

"That's good," Dorothy said.

"No, what this perfume does is magnify the other person's desire. They already wanted to do it. Now they want to do MORE of it."

"I see," Dorothy said, ready to get back to the newspaper.

"It doesn't work all the time," Blanche said. "The effect is strongest under the light of a full moon."

"Don't tell me," Dorothy said. "You've got another hot date tonight."

Blanche beamed. "Full moon, meet Ken."

"But if Ken's already going out with you, you don't need the perfume," Dorothy said.

"Oh, I never exactly NEED it, honey. It's just a little insurance policy," Blanche said. "You're sure you haven't borrowed it or seen it anyplace?"

Dorothy shook her head. "No, sorry."

Sophia walked into the kitchen, a brown paper bag in her arms.

"Where have you been?" Dorothy asked. "I thought you were going to the grocery store."

"That's where I was," Sophia said, setting the grocery bag on the table.

"Did you get distracted talking to Norman?" Blanche asked. Norman was a grocery bagger in his seventies who Blanche was convinced was sweet on Sophia.

"Norman got distracted talking to me!" Sophia said. "It took him half an hour to put two cans in a bag. Two cans, a bag. What's the mystery? But I guess not everyone's as sharp as yours truly." She gestured to herself and left the kitchen.

Dorothy looked at Blanche. Blanche looked at Dorothy. Then they both looked in the direction Sophia had gone.

"Ma!" Dorothy called.

But Blanche was faster, and was already leaving the kitchen. "Sophia, you give that perfume back right now!"


End file.
